Trust.
I just wrote a long post on trust. But I can’t share everything I’d like with as much ethos as I have without dishonoring people who stand redeemed & forgiven before God and man. So I’ll just say this:
Chose to trust.
Don’t hold onto hurt under the guise of protecting yourself.
People become what others expect them to become. If you choose to never again forgive and/or trust the one who has betrayed you, you’re dooming them to repeat history. (Forgiveness and trust are two different things that don’t always have to go hand in hand.)
I don’t know who Walter Anderson is/was, but I saw this quotation ascribed to him, and I love it: “We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy.”
I’ve found that my life is so much better when I chose to be vulnerable and trust rather than hoard hurt and pain. Yes, trust has to be earned. And it takes time to rebuild trust. But don’t prolong that time. Don’t stubbornly refuse to trust just because you like the feeling of martyrdom.
To trust is to make a sacrifice. Sacrificing your own comfort (not safety), in order to help the other person become a better person.
“Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another… Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not… Recompense no man evil for evil… If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord… Be not overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.” ~Romans 12:10-21
Paul said,
April 22, 2011 at 12:10 am
Regarding your Walter Anderson quote and the link between trust and joy, I heard someone this week say, “Joy is someone else being glad to be with me.”
Grace said,
April 22, 2011 at 2:31 am
Oh my goodness. Yes. Thank you for this, Janie. <3